Click here to Apply/Join Flash’s Rogue Gallery

Hello there, Captain Cold here. Besides being famous for my dashing attire from Gucci’s Winter collection, I’m one of most well-known rogues from Flash’s rogue gallery.
… and the Scarlet Speedsters got a whole bunch of ’em rogues, so that shows how famous I am.

Just to point out, there are a few visual-aids to help me through this recruitment process. If you have a hard time reading them, you can click to make it bigger.

So why should you join Flash’s Rogue Gallery?

Well I’ll tell ya why!
This gang functions like a brotherhood. Bros before hoes. We stick by each other, even through the roughest time. We respect each other.

… Fucking hell, we sound like frat guys.

The key members of the Rogues, other then myself, are; Mirror Master, Weather Wizard, Heat Wave and the new and annoying Trickster.

We have our differences, but together we’re Flash’s rogues… actually we just want to get rich and famous, but Flash gets in the way, so we result to fighting him.

We’re looking for someone who we can trust and know will stick around… certain level of ass kicking is required.

Once there was a time when we screwed up big time… when we killed Kid Flash. Everyone was like “fuck the rogues.” and ditched us. But we rogues, we stuck by each other. Fuck Libra. Fuck Secret Society. We just need each other to make things work again, and we did.

If you want to join us, you have to follow the rules. Yes, we’re “villains”, but we do have rules.

Rule #1
Never kill a Speedster.

You better be a quick learner, coz we don’t have hard-copies of the rules.

Other rules include “don’t leave the toilet seat up”, “don’t chew chewing gums in the clubhouse”, “Friday’s a pizza night”, “Thou shall respect each other”, and we’re all allocated when to water the plants.

Because we function like the brotherhood, we have dos and don’ts. We want everyone to be happy and healthy. So one of the most important rules include…

When I punch ya, it’s out of love.

After this event, we decided to make an addiction support facility, a rehab center, but only for the rogue members. We even have our own confession circle too!

Heat Wave: “I’m here because…- …”
Mirror Master: “C’mon Mick, you can say it.”
Heat Wave: “I’m here because…. because… I accidentally killed my family!”
Weather Wizard: “There there Mick,… it’s okay… we’re here for you”

If you think you can follow our simple rules, proceed to the next page.

***

Ok, glad you’re still here with us.
Now for the benefits of joining The Rogues.

We have matching jackets! If you qualify as one of us, you’ll recieve a welcome gift, via mail or hand.

You could say the Catcher in the Rye is the closest thing we have to a rule book.

We’ll also send you a fruit basket.

So what is the main function of this villainous group and how do we avoid Flash?
We, The Rogue Gallery (that’s our official name), just do our thing. Rob banks and jewellery stores, hack into a data warehouse, create havoc in Keystone City… just evil schemes to get rich quickly.
Oh, and we aren’t planning on taking over the World anytime soon. The doors right behind you.

To answer the second part of the question, we can’t avoid that nitwit Flash.
He’ll come zooming out of nowhere, and POW, he got your right at the jaw. But if we work as a team we have a chance of escaping and/or hurting him… thus the formation of the Rogues.

We offer medical insurance.

and After a long hard day, we like to party… hard!

As much as we like Mirror Master’s party, no party’s better than Flash’s. Citizens of Keystone knows how to throw an awesome one!

Gotta love that chum!

You gotta be thinking why and how the Rogue Gallery still exists since Barry Allen’s time.
That’s because we don’t get personal with the Flash. Sure, we hate his guts! But we hate the Flash, and not the man behind it.

We don’t go around killing their spouses you know?

Sometimes we’re reffered to as roaches. But without us Rogues, Flash won’t be as great and loved by the citizens. I think he knows this, and sometimes even goes easy on us.

Don’t get me wrong, he throws us into Iron Heights time to time.
We just get out from there.

… and that, ladies and gents, is how we stay in business.

and we’re also proud to quote…

“They may have goofy names and wear bright colours, but that doesn’t mean they’re idiots.”
– Flash

Hypocrite!

There you go. I hope you read this over, and consider applying to become a Rogue. Just send your curriculum vitae to the e-mail below, and if we want to meet you, we’ll give you a call.
Don’t call us, we’ll call you.

But if you have any inquiries, please do call.

E-mail: fearsome_rouges@hotmail.com

Telephone: (930) 273-2665

*****

ahaha, a cute Dick and Wally moment

Up, Up and Away! … then Down, Down it goes…

Yesterday was an awesome day. But not today :(

As I mentioned in the last part of yesterday’s entry, I was like waaay looking forward for Nightwing #147 and a TPB I ordered. But OH THE TRAGEDY!, no new comics were released at my comic book store!

side note: It takes an extra day for new comic release in Hong Kong.

Because of the typhoon which skimmed past Hong Kong on Wednesday , all business was closed… therefore the boxes of comic goodness was still at the airport this afternoon. Dude, it wasn’t that bad…. I mean like sure, the wind was knocking all the trash cans over and the rain flooded the rural areas, but come on! ugh, I love being so selfish.

But I’m a REALLY lazy fucker, so it takes great commitment for me to go ALL the way to the comic book store. And it opens at like 3pm, and all the cool cartoons starts around 5pm so I gotta go real quicky.
ahaha I read what I wrote, and I hate myself! :D

So while I was there, I did buy Titans #3 (grrr they didn’t have #2) so I’ll be kinda up to date when issue 4 comes out on the 27th! *high-five* I also grabbed the last copy of Final Crisis: Rogue’s Revenge #1, which I have yet to read.

And I also wrote a list of Nightwing and Flash issues to buy. But sadly, there weren’t any left. The issues I wanted were all Nightwing/Flash crossovers! :( I hate it when people think like me (or when I think like people)!
I wanted issue #211, and it would go something like…

*Me flipping through comics*
#208
*flip*
#209
*flip*
#210
“omg, I’m like so sure they’ll have #211 since they had the previous 3 issues”
*flip*
#212

Evil organised comics put in numerical order to fool me!
That, my children, is one evil motherfucking way to raise someone’s hope. And then to crush it with the mits!

… and yea, that happened to like every single issue I wanted :)

*le sigh*

But a good thing did happen! I really enjoyed ready Titans #3! I loved the first issue, and thought Judd Winick got lucky. But now I think I really like his stuff? and even though the artist is different from #1, the art’s still top notch.
I’m Lovin’ It! (sue me -_-)

***

From here on, it may contain spoilers and traces of nuts.

So just don’t read from here onwards if you’re allergic to nuts.

OK, so what you need to know about this issue is that Wally’s a wanker and you’ll get a massive urge to kick him in the arse. BUT that’s not the Wally we know, because he’s a cutie sweetie pie guy. Mmmm, pie guy~ *drools* Raven and Beast Boy goes on a bitch fit and they start fighting each other, yadda yadda yadda. And it turns out that they were acting “out of character” because evil people gave them cooties.
I air quoted, because I think the way they acted in this issue’s how they feel about each other, but was multiplied by like 14.8ish.

There’s waaay more to this issue, I just don’t wanna type it all out because I don’t want DC’s sales to go down… and I hate typing summarise. So go buy it folks!

Anyway, there’s this steamy scene where Nightwing and Starfire are having sex.

For your viewing pleasue, click for bigger.

That fucking guppy-like skank!

That’s like… soooo un-professional Dick! And I like super duper deny that Dick still has feelings for Star coz he like SOOO got over her years ago, and is like in-total-love with Michelle! (I’m destined to direct a chick-flick movie)

So to wrap it up, I’m a fat ass that already ate 1K calories before dinner that’s going to go read a comic book.

Toodles!

To-mo-row I’m getting…
*chants* Nightwing issue 1-4-7, Nightwing issue 1-4-7, Nightwing issue 1-4-7, */chants*

yay!

This is why…

I love Nightwing.

… and you should too. :)

You should checkout Philip Tan’s Deviantart. But this one’s the most amazingest by far.
I hope it’s going to be used for an issue cover, crossing my finger for a Nightwing and Flash crossover (notice the lightening?)… but I highly doubt it. But nothing wrong with wishful thinking.

GREAT NEWS FOR WALLY WEST FANS!
Even though Barry Allen came back and is probably “becoming” The Flash again, Wally isn’t going no where! My worst case scenario was Wally dying, and Barry replacing him. But thankfully that’s not happening.
And Wally’s costume is getting a makeover!

Are there any changes in store for current Flash Wally West’s costume? “I’m redesigning Wally West’s costume right now, and it’s terrifying.” While Sinestro’s costume, with its seemingly random blue color and “jester collar,” was ready for a redesign in Van Sciver’s eyes, “Wally West is the most perfectly designed costume ever, aside from Green Lantern’s costume, in my opinion.” Van Sciver said the challenge was to redo the costume without either making it less cool or more cool than Barry Allen’s and thus implying that one character is better than the other.

You can read the full thing here.

Ahhh! OMG, I’M SO EXCITED!!!! x)))))))
I really hope Wally’s new costume’s cooler than Barry’s old Flash costume! And man, now I have to follow the Final Crisis story! I don’t like big tie-ins and major events, but I seriously need to know what’s gonna happen (Buy FC #3 on 6th Aug)!

You can read my other blog on Return of Barry Allen.

Gosh, I can’t sleep tonight! o.o

Death, Resurrection and Roll-ups

Batman fans will know that there’s a ‘Batman RIP‘ thing going on.

and it’s jingle goes something like…

Are you ready for “Batman R.I.P.”?

Who will live? Who will die? Who will be Batman?
The answers are sure to shock you in “Batman R.I.P.,”

*bites nails*
Shit son, I’m not ready!
As stupid as this may sound, I don’t want to find out what happens! I don’t want anyone to die, especially none of the Bat-family. And there’s been an on-going debate on who makes a better Batman; Nightwing or Robin. Sorry Damian, you’re out of the picture!

… and just to make it clear, Damian is Batman’s genetic son. Oh the family drama!

I just think Nightwing should stay as Nightwing. Robin (Tim) should stay as a sidekick/partner. Damian’s too ninja-like,… and isn’t he younger than Tim? Jason Todd (Red Robin), I don’t really like him, and I think he still has cooties/the evils.

Unless the next Batman’s gonna be female!
Barabara, original Batgirl, crippled, out of the picture. Current Batgirl, Cassandra, her being Batman’s a little too awkward. … Huntress? HUNTRESS, SMASH!!!!! nahhh….
Or maybe Batwoman? I never read any of her runs, so I have no idea what she’s like. And I don’t like the name Batwoman, it’s three syllables, a bit hard to cry for help yanno? “BAT-MAN!!!” “BAT-GIRL!!!” “BAT-wo-MAN!!!“.
In Final Crisis: Revelations (#1 out in Aug 13th), she’s returning from wherever she was, and she looks damn fine!

What I’m trying to say is,
I prefer Bruce Wayne as Batman. He’s the perfect creep to fill-up the suit.
I don’t follow the Bat-series, and I’m not intending too. I’ll just read the final spoiler (“Who will be Batman”), or get someone to spoil it for me.

If you’re interested, here’s the pull-list for Batman R.I.P.

Checkout Nightwing #149 , he goes against Batman’s rogue gallery… like all of them at once! I think it’s gonna be SHWEEEEET, must buy!

***

Lets make this clear.
I’m not hating on Barry.
Most people seems to like the Silverage Barry.
But DUDE! It’s time to MOVE ON!

Maybe he’s going to be used as a plot device instead of taking Wally’s mantle as The Flash. Well, I’m cool with that. Or maybe his return is temporary, and he goes back to where ever La-La Land his residence’s at. I’m also cool with that.

But I will not be cool if Barry brings his old ass back into the picture, and decides to steal Wally’s costume!!!

Fuck! I’ll be so pissed.
I’ll be SO pissed that I will run downstairs, dig-up all of the nicely planted flowers, grab the closest tree and swing it into civilians, drink up all the swimming pool water so no one can swim for the rest of the Summer, kick down all the apartment-buildings and cause a domino effect, do the Canary-Cry and blowup the closest airplane flying, and HULK OUT and go on a murderous RAMPAGE!
… or maybe I’ll just rant on my blog.

I would be equally as pissed if Wally has to become ‘Kid Flash‘ again.

… we’ll see how it goes *gives off the evils*

I’m like totally sway with Jay being The Flash, because he has a different costume. And he also has a different set of friends (JSA). Plus he’s old. I like old people.

But other then that, I’m glad that ol’ speedster’s alive. :) I wonder what major Flash plot-line he’s gonna bring along.

AHA!
New Promo image for The Flash: Rebirth!

Click for bigger image and Click for article.

***

Mmmm~… effective marketing~…

This way to Nightwing Goodness

The day started ugly.

And I know that none of you will give a damn.

I had a big pimple between my eyes. I squeezed it. It started to bleed. It hurt.
Something was wrong with my mascara brush. I couldn’t find my black eyeshadow. I applied my blush un-evenly.

I still know you don’t give a damn.

I couldn’t choose which bottom to wear. Jeans or mini-skirt? I went with the mini.
Which bag to take with me, a handbag or a rabbit rucksack? I went with the handbag.
I couldn’t remember where I placed my hairbrush, my mirror, gums?, my chap-stick and my wallet.

I bet you’re waiting for my Nightwing goodness.

I left home. And I went back to change my bag and shoes. I swapped my bag for the rabbit rucksack. I swapped my shoes for a big-toed ankle covering sneakers, it made my feet look big. Wow, that’s a mouthful.
But big feet’s cool. That means you can take up more place of the street… which is cool, i guess.

I decided to turn myself into Wolverine.

SO!
I order 5 TPB today, yay!
I ordered the the first three volume of Runaways (digest version coz im cheap). The MUCH anticipated Runaways! Fuck, I’m so excited already!
I just have to wait for 2 weeks… grrr.
I also ordered The Flash: Secret of Barry Allen, for good ol’ Flash goodness! and Outsiders/Teen Titans: Insiders, which I was skeptical about purchasing *shifty eyes*, but i did…

So, where’s the Nightwing goodness you’re looking for?
Lets starts it now,

I was seriously planning on waiting for the Titans TPB, because I didn’t want to purchase the monthly issue. Mostly because of the pressure of ‘having to buy it every month’ . Yes, I could get a Pull-list, but my income’s unstable, meaning that i strictly rely on monthly pocket money which I tend to plurge impulsivly. So when I grow up, my dream is to have a Pull-list!

MOVING ON!
I couldn’t WAIT any longer! I bought issue #1! Now I have to go look for #2-#4, great. It exceeded my expectation.

IT WAS AMAZING! NO KIDDING!

I have new found respect for Judd Winick. Nightwing was not a Virgin Mary toast! He was actually really cool and awesome, and it wasn’t because of his looks!

And did I mention the art?
After I post this I’m gonna go find out who did it! I think I found my favourite artist!

If you don’t know what Titans is, all former member of the Teen Titans (Dick, Wally, Roy etc.’s generation) gets back together. And does whatever superheroes do.

Heeey, where’s Roy’s hand?
(clockwise: Nightwing, Beast Boy, Raven, Starfire, Donna Troy, Cyborg, Flash)
hmmmm~

But OMG, this conversation between Roy (Red Arrow) and his daughter, Lian, is too cute!
eeeep! x]

Who would’ve thought! Mr. Skootch was the one responsible of putting waffles into the DVD player!
ahaha!

and naked Starfire tempting Animalman’s son… or not.

and where would I be without the Wally goodness.
I swear this issue has tons of nudity.

Guess who interrupted this amazingly interesting talk about mixing carbs and mayo? (No sarcasm intended)
The evil red goo. Curses!

and oh my…
Ho Ho Ho, I swear this issue was made for me!

*pssst* Wally! I don’t like putting carbs and mayo together either, i think that’s a decent excuse to get married. :)~

Dude, it really made me wonder why I didn’t bother buying the Titans when it first came out!
I really like Flash (Wally), Red Arrow and Nightwing. And they all happened to be in the Titans!
Schoopid schoopid Mao!

***

While I was at the comic book store, I also purchased The Brave and the Bold: Nightwing and Hawkman (plus Deadman).
I know I’m a week late, but… I don’t care!

They were great!
Nightwing was superb! Worth a million bucks!

Today started shitty, but I ran into TWO Nightwing goodness in one day!
WOHOO!

*

Then, they made him look like a douchebag…
No, the enemy didn’t push him off the side. He ran… jumped and hoped to make it to the other side… but sadly, didn’t…

Psssh! Nightwing, a douche?!
He ain’t, brotha!

So the story in a nutshell is… Nightwing lies to the Justice League, JSA, Outsiders and Teen Titans, so Hawkman, Deadman and himself can fight a big ugly dragon who has Green Arrow captive.
It sounds lame, but it’s actually real cool :)

Mmm~, douchebags~